In one of many glass buildings, surrounded in a cubicle adorned with math-rock bands, pet cat photos, and some pride flags alongside a CSU flag. Nermal sits in a gamer chair with a smile on his chimpanzee face, clacking away at a steady pace doing work.

His co-worker Eric came to his office with a shit eating smirk on his face. Nermal turned around to see him standing slightly obscured behind some white board. “Hiya Eric! It’s good to see you, how are you?” He said in a higher tone trill. “Hi Nermz. I’m doing well. I heard you were recently tasked with the 2007 project.” Eric then eyed the white board; on it the words “Update 2007”.

Nermal puts his glasses on the table and rubs his eyes and sighs. “You just wrote that. Josh is the only one who touches that cesspit.” The thought alone is enough to exhaust him. Eric’s Walrus face doesn’t move, but he can tell he’s laughing on the inside. “Nermzy, You can’t handle it? I can do it with my eyes closed.”

“You barely open your eyes.” Nermal gives himself a little pep talk “Alright, I got this. You just sit your happy ass down. I’ll fucking wrangle that mess. What do I even have to do? Like implement some random restrictive bypass to extend some compatibility… Something like that?”

“No, worse. Your modifying the main shit with new shit, and re-writing all relevant documentation to reflect that.”

His heart is beating, and that is all he can hear. “If your young stubbornness fails you this time, you can ask these old bones to help you Nermz… Yeah, you’re not even listening. Helloooo~ Good luck idiot.” Eric left Nermal’s office.

The last week have been nothing but a blur in Nermal’s mind. The last thing he can remember is scant memories of death gripping his chair in anger after reading some of the most disorganized documentation he’s ever read. A breakthrough is immanent, he is letting himself feel hope. His hours of reading borderline gibberish are going to pay off.

He found where to add to the main system, and he can finally deal with the random edge cases and start debugging. It’ll be over soon. “Who needs that old Walrus? I can hang with the big dogs. Ain’t that right Lil Nixon.” His cat just stares at him from the utterance of it’s name.

“Your talking to a picture of your cat.” Eric snapped Nermal back to reality. He’s in his office. “Have you been sleeping?” Nermal ignores his concerns “Hey, Eric. I get it you can do this while you sleep. I got this under control. I’m able to see inside the minds of the three people who made this back in 2007. You wanna guess what I saw?”

“You haven’t seen sunlight in a bit.” Eric quipped. Nermal interrupted his lame joke “*Shh* Nothing. I saw nothing.”

“I’ll go ahead and tell them that the next time I see them. Whenever you’re ready to admit some defeat. I could  take a look at it for you. Hanging with the ‘big dawgs’ or whatever you were mumbling about.”

Nermal slumped into his gaming chair adorned with punk rock hello kitty stickers. “I want to kill myself.” Eric was in the middle of leaving Nermal’s office content to leave him the offer of help, but when he heard what came out of his mouth. He looked up and saw tears well up on his face. Nermal must have believed Eric couldn’t hear him anymore.
Eric had the choice to pretend he didn’t hear him, and simply go back to work, but even this old stoic soul couldn’t bring himself the selfish comfort of ignorance. Eric slowly approached Nermal who was still slumped in his chair with his back towards him.

Eric placed his big hands on to his shoulders. The size discrepancy made Nermal’s shoulders look like he was a emaciated child even when he’s only moderately short. Then he leaned down and hugged his back. Nermal’s curly ears and chimp ears entangle themselves into the whiskers and saber teeth of Eric.

Nermal froze within himself, and then he quietly cried the tears of someone who hasn’t felt love in a while. This was the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to him since college.

Then the moment was over, and Eric went to his office.

Nermal tried to go back to work, but he had to admit to himself that he couldn’t hang with the big dogs, and yet he didn’t want to terminate his assignment on this Earth anymore. The thought was foolish. “Why am I letting one challenge completely spiral my whole sense of self-worth?” That question could probably be answered another time.

Now is the time to lock in. HE TRIUMPHANTLY started typing on his little keyboard and bringing up notes. He was so locked in that he skipped his breaks and his shift was about to end. His brain was starting to fail, and so it was no surprise he didn’t make a lick of progress.

He looks out of the window. “He subconsciously is imagining the wind rushing past him. Maybe he can whirl his tail fast enough and become a helicopter and escape all this with a new career. One of a freak, and they’ll call him “Hairy Helli”. “That’s so fucking stupid.” He tells himself letting the words bounce around the office. He balls his fist and starts smashing his desk. Papers, and cute figurines fly everywhere. Some co-worker pipes “gay fury!”. Nermal had to admit that was kind of funny, and soon he calmed down.

Eric came back to Nermal’s office hearing the commotion. “Nermzy, I like your new remodeling. Don’t worry I’m not hear to hug you again.” Nermal’s energy was now completely zapped, and he slowly descended into his chair. He was about to beg for help on his knees. When he notice Eric had a smile. Not the usual stone face with a hidden smile like he’s used to. “What? You okay?” Nermal was incredibly befuddled with Eric’s behavior lately.

Eric lifted his arm and pointed to Nermal’s computer. “Check the company’s network share”. “What did you do? You trying to cheer me up with a pirated video game or something?” Nermal logged in and navigated through to share folder. In it was bliss, serenity, and perfection.

It was simply called “2007_update” Nermal’s eyes were completely wide, and his jaw was dragging on the floor. He inspected the sub-folders hoping this wasn’t a prank. It was all here. The only thing left was to write the new documentation.

	The old Nermal returned “Oh my gosh! Thank you! Thank you! X 5” every ‘thanks’ was faster then the last. He couldn’t help himself to throwing himself in Eric and embracing him. This was the kindest thing that anyone has ever done for him. He felt he could kiss him. Well Eric didn’t seem to be pulling away, and those two sort of stared at every feature in each others face. Eric’s was the first to push his arms further up Nermals back and lock in. Then Nermal pushed his chest further into Eric’s making their shirt buttons clash.
They both closed their eyes and could feel Eric’s whisker, and then they could feel more whiskers, and then they kissed. They were both thinking the same thing about this job, and office. “We’ve been stressing about responsibilities for too long, and I’m just about feeling it’s time to get a little irresponsible.” They both chuckled. “Nermz, that’s corny as hell.” Eric could still sling his classic zingers. “If blunt is what you want… I want to suck~ your dick :3”

Then Nermal’s started undoing Eric’s belt while undoing his button up shirt. Soon He was leading him to sit in his gamer chair. His member was a little shy and needed some encouragement. Nermal felt up his thighs moving towards his gluteus maximus. His wet nose buried into his scrotum. It left a little condensation and felt warm and a little wet.

Both of their breathing started to pick up as it started to become more real. It stopped being a penis, and transformed into a cock. Each genitalia had their own emotions and they all screamed for attention! Some goosebumps and veins emerged from Eric’s shaft. Eric was still tense like an “at attention” soldier. Then Nermal started to open his mouth blowing hot moist air on to him.

Eric’s face was scrunched “Nermzy, buddy you going to do something?” Getting a little impatient with the teasing. Before he could finish a second plead Nermal tubed his tongue and slid it down his throat like a magazine going into a handgun. Eric’s soul left him, and he completely relaxed into a deep coma of pleasure. What Eric’s dick lacked in length it made up for in throbbing volatility.

The veins pulsed down his tongue as if they were living worms feasting on an apple. Nermal sucked and coated it with a nice lubricating special chimp saliva. Very occasionally the dick hit the right angle to touch the back of his throat. This made Nermal’s eyes water a little and he’d try to scoop the penis into his cheeks.

Nermal was happy to see Eric’s dopey pleasure face. It was completely unlike him to even emote let alone look like a fool. But he couldn’t help himself from wondering what this almost vibrating cock would feel like within. Could we even get away with more intense sex at work? The absurd question has an obvious answer. No they couldn’t get away with any sex. So if they’re already in trouble…

Nermal stopped his suck-extravaganza and sat in Eric’s lap chest facing eachother. “Please baby! I need you inside of me.” Nermal was playing up his usual dramatic flair. This time some of the office went quiet. Eric face was completely devoid of emotion. Nermal thought to himself “FUCK I’M SO STUPID! I just embarrassed him. Obviously no one wants to be known as the one who fucked an ugly whore like me.” Eric’s hand held on to his, and he started lifting and pushing him away.

Nermal felt like he could almost cry.

…

“Nermzy, bud what’s the matter?”

“I dunno, I just got the feeling you think I’m ugly is all.”

“Nermzy, I’m literally fucking you right now.” Then he put his forehead onto his and they stared into themselves, and there Eric could see how he looked. “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to show love Nermal.”

“It’s fine, I just freak out some times” A touching smile was shared. “If it’s okay with you I’d like to continue.”

“Sure I’d love to continue, but I have to consult my folks first.” Then he shouted to all of the office if he could continue and they all exclaimed some sort of cheer or something. The same co-worker yelled “Gay Furry!” In a funny approving tone.

Eric lead Nermal to the carpet floor. Pulling off his belt and revealing the goods. A coincidental bonus is that Nermal hasn’t eaten in a long time so he’s completely cleaned out and ready. The slimy, thick, and warm saliva completely covered his dick and soaked into his pubic hair. Giving his balls a greaser hairdo. He rubbed the lubricant all around his asshole. His dick was rolling around in the hot dog bun.

“Nermzy?” he slowly asked. “Yaasss?” he quickly replied. There was a couple seconds of pause. “Please give it to me” he pleaded. Still a couple more seconds “I get it ha~ HA, I teased you. This is different. That was a blowjob, this is ass fucking!” His body jumped up and down with each emphatic word. As he took huge breathes. “Heh heh” Eric’s minimal laugh. Then he gripped his ass with his huge hands.

His foreskin pushed in like a shovel breaking through the crust of grass. *Tip* *Tap* and breach.

The flesh enclosed around him, and Nermal made moans of focus. The veins of his cock rolled in turbulent pulses along the walls of the edge of his intestines. When he pulled out the anus gripped him like a good handshake from a real brotha. The pressure of the chamber changed and air got sucked in.

Then the quake happened. The pressure released and a loud cacophony erupted. A fart so gnarly it couldn’t be ignored. “God damn Nermz, What’d you eat?” Eric jested. “That’s not funny you know I didn’t take a break today.” Nermal trying not to remember how hungry he is.

Between heavy grunts of pleasure, and pushing his dick into his cave he said “We’ll get something to eat after this, alright buddy.” Nermal couldn’t give a reply with his voice; so he threw a thumbs up.

All of Eric’s weight was plunging into Nermal. His body was even shuffling on the carpet giving mild rug burn, and his dick was leaking cum with every thrust, pooling onto the carpet of his office.

“Oh gosh”

“Nermz, I’m close”

It culminates into a ridiculously messy finish. Like a white paint grenade went off.

	At a diner they sit down and are welcomed by employees who don’t care. They both still have semen on their hair and clothes, but who cares? They’re at a table enjoying some food. “Do you think we’ll be fired?” is a question they both share. But they aren’t worried. So long as they have each other the world seems a little bit easier to tackle. Besides they’re the only ones who know how to work on the 2007 update.

-Nakey Fakey