All of Harold’s Pokemon had gathered around as their master brought a large cardboard box through the front door and set it in the living room.

“Behold!” the man exclaimed as he cut open the top, “My newest acquisition!” 

Scolipede and Gengar, being tall and floating (respectively), were able to get a glimpse of what was inside before the others could; their eyes widened. Mareanie, Zweilous, and Zorua had to wait a few seconds as Harold cut down the sides of the box and tore it apart.

Sitting in the remains of the box was a robot resembling a Hydreigon. Its heads were slumped over, eyes blank. Portions of the robot’s body looked like they could light up, but were dark at the moment.

“Zor’a?” Zorua said, sniffing tentatively. 

Zweilous’ heads turned to look at each other, then back to the robot, cocking in confusion.

“That’s right,” Harold said smugly, looking at the small dragon, “You might be replaced soon!”

Zweilous frowned, taking a few steps back.

“Now, how do I turn this blasted thing on…” Harold mumbled before looking down. “Oh, here we go.” 

Sticking out from under the robotic Pokemon was a thick booklet labelled “Owner’s Manual.” Harold picked it up and quickly skimmed the pages. “I’m not reading all this!” He tossed the book behind him, where it sailed harmlessly through Gengar and hit the wall behind it. 

“Gar!” the ghost Pokemon exclaimed in surprise. It scowled, raising its middle finger.

A piece of paper, having fallen out of the book when Harold tossed it, fluttered down in front of him. He snatched it out of the air and read it aloud. “In a hurry? Try Automatic Setup Support!”

Harold stopped reading for a moment. “Well, I am most certainly in a hurry!” he muttered before continuing, “To enable Automatic Setup Support, simply press the button on the center nose.” Having reached the end, he flipped the paper over; the other side was blank. “Well, seems simple enough,” 

It took a moment of searching, but Harold managed to find a very small button on the tip of the main head’s nose. He pushed it, and a portion of the machine’s body lit up with glowing pink light.

“Maree!” Mareanie uttered, mouth agape.

The mouth on the robot’s central head opened, projecting a robotic voice. “You have activated  Automatic Setup Support for your [Iron Jugulis]. To continue, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

“Iron Jugulis?” Harold asked, puzzled. “The respectable gentleman in that back alley said this was a genuine robotic Hydreigon.” His eyes widened. “Ah, yes, of course, that must be the brand.” He reached over and pressed the button.

The robotic tone continued. “Step [One]: Make sure the unit is on a clean, level surface. When this action has been completed, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

Harold looked at the decimated cardboard box the Iron Jugulis rested on, “This looks flat enough to me,” he said, pressing the button again.

“Error!” the robotic voice exclaimed, “Unstable surface detected. Please make sure the unit is on a clean, level surface. When this action has been completed, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

Harold growled, then pressed the button again.

“Error! Unstable surface detected. Please make sure the unit is on a clean, level surface. When this action has been completed, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

“Harumph!” Harold grumbled. With much effort, he managed to hoist the robotic Pokemon up onto the counter. After taking a moment to catch his breath, he turned to his other Pokemon.

“Just you wait! When this is ready, it will be the best of my Pokemon yet!” He smirked. “Unlike you lot, it won’t make disgusting soiled diapers for me to change every day!” He pushed the button.

“Step [Two]: Dress your [Iron Jugulis] in an industrial-strength diaper. This unit requires [thrice]-daily biofuel intake, and will periodically produce waste-product requiring disposal. When this action has been completed, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

Scolipede snorted a quiet laugh, not that Harold heard; the man had already marched off to the bedroom for a diaper to put on the robot, grumbling the entire time.

Once the Iron Jugulis had been snugly wrapped in a luxury ball-patterned diaper, Harold  again pushed the button.

The Iron Jugulis’ eyes lit up now, as the voice instructed, “Step [Three]: Please wait while the unit performs an initial waste flush. When this action has been completed, press the button on the [Center] [Nose].”

“Initial waste - ?” Harold started to ask, before being interrupted by a rumble from the robot’s belly.

With an audible hissing sound, the Iron Jugulis’ diaper quickly started puffing out in the front and bottom. The rear of the garment started bulging out and sagging, as a nauseating chemical smell overtook the room.

“Oh, Arceus!” Harold swore as he ran to open a window.